3.乱用大词
First of all, children can earn money from their jobs, although there isn”t too much, but they will keep their salary gingerliness.
这里的gingerliness根本是不知所云。该句子还有以下问题:
1)该作文题目是讲学生是否应该做兼职,因此children的出现就显得很莫名其妙;
2)although和but是不能连用的;
3)指代不明,they不知道是指代前面的什么;